


what i want

by somepeachythings (Patsch)



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Feelings Realization, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Lovers, Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun is Whipped, M/M, Short & Sweet, Suh Youngho | Johnny is Whipped
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:08:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24929710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Patsch/pseuds/somepeachythings
Summary: Jaehyun was the center of Johnny's attention and affection. Until one day he wasn't. And Jaehyun really really didn't like that.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Suh Youngho | Johnny, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 7
Kudos: 170





	what i want

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little story where Jaehyun realizes how dependent on Johnny he really was and his way of finding out more about himself in the (temporary) absence of it. 
> 
> \- 
> 
> I felt the need to write something comforting before I really think about my fest fic. In a few days we need to submit the summaries and I really wanna try out a new pairing I enjoy reading as well, but also there is a more complex soulmate johnjae au I want to work on. If anyone is wondering the au would go like this:
> 
> (soulmate au where after meeting your soulmates eyes your world erupts in colors and turns back into black and white after severe rejection/death. 
> 
> johnny and jaehyun are best friends and soulmates. a coincidence in their childhood makes them believe they aren’t.)
> 
> Anyway back to this little piece, I hope you enjoy reading ~

Something changed.

Jaehyun looked around in search for his friends, normally he found their place right away without any problem. Out of the corner he saw Doyoung waving to get his attention and went to their lunch table.

There was just one problem.

His seat was, well, _taken._

It wasn't that they had a rule where each of them sat. Just, it was _normal_ for him to take the seat next to Johnny, because it was already secured for him. By Johnny, he did that. Every day.

Said seat was currently preoccupied with a pretty freshman, who had way too many freckles in Jaehyun's humble opinion and a vey adorable button nose.

All in all he was cute. Even his stature and wavy blonde hair was cute.

Jaehyun furrowed his eyebrows and met his friends eyes, Johnny looked a bit sheepish. Why would remain a mystery to Jaehyun. He just took it how it was and sat down next to Yuta. He wanted to talk to him about their next business assignment anyway.

So really no need to feel annoyed that his routine changed a bit. It was a minor thing. 

_Right._

It was only the start.

*

So his name was Donghyuck. Apparently he was Mark's close friend and since Mark was studying abroad this semester, Johnny volunteered to take care of him. Big brothers duty and all.

Kind, always helping others out, Johnny. Yeah, it'll be like that.

Jaehyun should technically feel neutral about this. Of course it was totally fine for his best friend to take care of someone else, it was a thing great guys did.

And Johnny was one. The best even. He always took care of his friends and in conclusion of him. Sometimes. 

Jaehyun was neither blind nor dumb.

The problem was Jaehyun never got to understand how much Johnny _actually_ did for him.

*

Lectures were so boring. Jaehyun normally went through them pretty well but there was something missing. Something that made it all so much more bearable. Suddenly the seat next to him was filled with a new presence and he picked up a comforting smell of vanilla.

“Sorry I needed to show Hyuckie around,” Johnny whispered while taking his laptop out to take notes. It was his routine, it was what he normally did. Nothing special. Jaehyun bit the inside of his cheeks to stifle a giggle that was approaching, for no reason and nodded once before looking back to the front.

Johnny typed on his laptop pretty loudly and also groaned more times than strictly necessary (and appropriate, since his groans sounded more like moans) but somehow the lecture flew by way better than before. Johnny's funny commentary also helped and made Jaehyun even laugh quietly a few times.

It was a great day.

*

It wasn't. Their friends were all gone and it started to rain but Jaehyun still stood at the gates, lightly tapping his feet to the music he was listening to. Normally Johnny waited for him to arrive, today it seemed to be his turn.

Jaehyun was so absorbed in the music, it was one of his favorite rock bands, he only registered his friend when his headphones were taken away from him roughly.

“Jae, what are you doing here?” Taeyong looked at him with concerned eyes, his hand immediately reached for his forehead and he sighed in relief.

“Waiting for Johnny,” Jaehyun murmured quietly and looked away. Even though it was normal for Taeyong to be so caring, it still made him shy and a tiny bit uncomfortable. Because of his height he still found it strange to be babied, even by his hyungs.

Taeyong took a step back and bit on his lips nervously. Jaehyun saw him fiddling with his oversized pink sweatshirt, and knew he wouldn't like what his friend had to say. “Johnny already left the campus. Donghyuck has music classes and Johnny decided to accompany him.” Taeyong sighed when Jaehyun's face went blank after his first spoken sentence.

Like a robot Jaehyun nodded and bowed deeply. “Thanks for letting me know.”

He turned around to leave but Taeyong grabbed his wrist and gave him a warm smile, his eyes crinkling. “I'm hungry, let's grab some burgers and I will drive you home afterwards!” His voice sounded genuine excited and Jaehyun hadn't anything else planned, so he accepted Taeyong's offer. Also seeing his friend so cheerful was a bonus. 

And he also really loved to spend time with Taeyong. Just the two of them. He nearly forgot how much he loved their little dates and what a great friend Taeyong was, from the first day in high school when he took him under his wing until now. Really if it wasn't for Taeyong, he might've still been the same loner, who walked around in life aimlessly.

He was so often with Johnny, he seemed to forget to appreciate these beautiful humans in his life more often. So maybe he hugged Taeyong longer than necessary when he bought Jaehyun home, but neither of them mentioned it so it was fine.

Jaehyun picked up the box of his favorite chocolates with an ugly drawing on it from his doormat and tried to simultaneously open the door and the box. He sent a short thank you message to Johnny after eating half the box and fell into his bed quickly. Tired but with a full stomach and happy heart.

*

Next week Jaehyun turned up too late to the lecture they shared. Still half asleep from the disney movie marathon, he sat down without looking to his side. So he didn't see Johnny's thoughtful glance, who viewed his attire with puckered lips and stopped at the bright pink sweater.

Jaehyun looked up in surprise when he heard a cough and smiled at Johnny in a friendly manner after recognizing him. “What's up?”, he asked quietly and yawned afterwards. They really shouldn't do long nights on weekdays. Johnny frowned and shrugged his shoulder in a seemingly nonchalant manner.

Jaehyun tried to bring his attention back to the lecture, he could think about Johnny's weird behavior later.

*

Jaehyun whined loudly as he looked at his empty refrigerator, especially on an empty stomach. Jaehyun closed the door with a deep sigh and called delivery while writing down a shopping list. It took longer than he thought, especially considering he couldn't just write down _everything_ and be done with it _._

Johnny took care of his groceries usually and always made sure he was eating enough. Not surviving only on ramen alone.

Jaehyun smiled softly at his hands and sprinted to the door, when the bell rang. He was _really_ hungry.

*

It was by coincidence that Jaehyun met them at the fruit aisle. He was just picking up strawberries when he saw Johnny with Donghyuck. There was this weird feeling in his chest that was always occurring nowadays, when seeing the both of them together, but he chose to ignore it.

“Hello Jaehyun hyung,” Donghyuck greeted politely and bowed a bit. Jaehyun sighed at the unnecessary display but still grinned friendly at the freshman. He also couldn't resist to pat his hair, yup as silky as the thought. His smile turned soft when it landed on Johnny, who gave him a weird look again. Usually it made Jaehyun a bit uncomfortable, especially since his friend always looked like he could see right into his soul, but he felt comfortable enough today.

Jaehyun calmly put the two packs of strawberries next to his other groceries. “It was nice meeting you two,” he said with a big smile and then went his way.

The weird feeling came back when he arrived at home alone and when his Johnny-less-days taught him anything, it was time to figure himself out.

He wasn't so sure about the conclusion, if he would like what came out, but he would work on it one day at a time. For now he needed to put away his groceries before they go bad. Way too wasteful.

And maybe eat a few of the strawberries as well, they looked so sweet and juicy.

*

“So it's like that,” Doyoung said with a grave tone that was way too dramatic for what they were currently discussing, but he always had a flare for it. He was after all the guy who sang a pop song as a ballad to get the presidents chair. Doyoung lost in the end to the abs guy and to this day he still sneered when someone flashed his stomach. 

Jaehyun nodded a few times and wiped the dirt away from his kitchen table with a wet napkin. Doyoung narrowed his eyes but stayed silent otherwise.

“What are you going to do?” Jaehyun knew he drove Doyoung crazy nowadays. Normally his friend could read him like an open book and always tried to help him. Now it was way harder for him and it must frustrate him. He felt sorry for him.

But Jaehyun felt more at peace these days, with himself and with his life. He grew quite a bit, not in height that would be disastrous, but the way he perceived life on a day to day basis.

So he just shrugged and took a big sip of his chocolate milkshake Doyoung bought him. “I will see, when the time is right I'm gonna ask him.” Doyoung gave him a skeptical look, he was still concerned for his friend. And Jaehyun saw in his eyes, how he wanted to add more advice, maybe play out a few scenarios.

But this was also why he loved Doyoung and confined in him first, he knew when to stay quiet and watch. 

Jaehyun wasn't delusional, it was a big decision that could change everything in mere seconds. Also Doyoung respected his wishes, took one look at his peaceful aura and just leaned back, nodding.

“I trust you.”

Jaehyun rewarded him with his signature eye smile and his pretty dimples that came out naturally with his smile.

*

“Jaehyun!” A bit confused Jaehyun turned towards the shouting voice and after seeing his friend, he sighed in relief. Today was a hard day, he really didn't want to talk to people other than his friends.

“I barely see you anymore,” Johnny complained in a whiny tone and did the thing where he got into Jaehyun's personal space and towered over him a bit. Most of the times it would annoy Jaehyun how he towered over him, like the many things Johnny did just to annoy the hell out of him, because really it was a few centimeters at most, but nowadays it was kinda comforting to have him near like that and he basked silently in it.

Alas Johnny was pretty observant and figured it out quickly. It wasn't the first times these days that his friends behavior puzzled him. He also knew Jaehyun would tell him when the time was right and respected his silence. Jaehyun would be forever grateful for him, more than he would ever know.

Because if Johnny wasn't as patient and trusting as he was, things might've turned out very differently. Instead of going forward step by step, Jaehyun might've turned the other way and ran.

Far, far away.

But he was, so Jaehyun had more than enough time to figure it out in his own pace.

“If you wanna go out with me so badly, just say it and go,” Jaehyun flirted with a cheeky grin and turned around abruptly, walking away in long strides, not awaiting an answer. Little giggles flew out of his mouth when he thought about Johnny flabbergasted look. He needed to remember it forever.

At least he took the first step finally. Even if he kinda did run away afterwards. 

*

Jaehyun bought the drink to his lips with a big grin, it was Mark's ' _welcome back'_ party and he couldn't be happier. Actually there was a person happier than anyone else in the room, and it wasn't Johnny. Donghyuck attached himself to Mark's hip the second he entered their house for the surprise party and Mark didn't seem to mind it one bit. If Jaehyun was honest they were kinda c-

“They're cute,” a deep voice startled him out of his thoughts and he looked at Johnny in question. “I tried to encourage Donghyuck to confess, because even though my brother reciprocates his feelings, he would never take the first step. He's a coward and wants to be absolutely sure the other person likes him back first.”

Johnny shot him a meaningful look and Jaehyun bit the inside of his cheek in thought. A second later he emptied his full cup and stared straight into Johnny deep brown eyes. Not the time to get lost in them and maybe drowning the drink wasn't the best decision he made. But screw that. 

“You know who would also look cute?” That definitely wasn't what he intended to say but he would go with the flow now. No risk no fun after all. He practically felt the blush coming up from his neck into his face, he partly blamed the alcohol. “Hmm,” Johnny humored him, his eyes turning more cat like as his smile widened. Jaehyun immediately felt more like a prey, as the predator he intended to be right now. 

“Us,” Jaehyun nearly screamed and looked away in shame, he didn't miss the small look of surprise Johnny gave him. Honestly he felt accomplished, but in the end his embarrassment won. His ears were practically on fire. Johnny was the extrovert, the social one, the risk taker. On the other hand Jaehyun knew this was something that needed to be said and done, by him and he came prepared. For any outcome.

_Kinda._

“So ehm-,” Jaehyun stopped and took a deep breath, no need to rush it. He risked a glance at Johnny, whose face remained carefully blank. “We can go out. For an Iced Americano or stuff. If you like and are free.” This sounded familiar, like their normal hangouts. _You need to add something suave, flirty, get it tiger. You can do it!_

“Like a d-date,” Jaehyun finished lamely and bit into his lips anxiously. It could turn out two ways, either Johnny turned him down softly and they would try to remain friends or...

His heart was beating in his chest furiously, hoping for the other conclusion. Him _not_ having read everything wrong, that the possibility _was_ there of Johnny wanting more as well. That he only kept quiet so he wouldn't compromise their friendship.

That in a poetic kinda way he waited for Jaehyun to take the first step. That the way he described Marks feelings was actually a way of confessing his. Even if it did contradict everything Johnny stood for. Everything he knew him for. 

Sometimes even the strong ones were afraid of simple things. Like losing a special bond.

Jaehyun exhaled shakily when Johnnys big, warm hands engulfed his and he was met with the brightest smile.

“I'd love to.”

Perfect, this was perfect.

“Also we would be much cuter,” Johnny added cheekily, because it was such a Johnny thing to do. Jaehyun shook his head but still joined in his laughter. So grateful for this big giant, who knew exactly what to do to make him feel more calm. The butterflies in his stomach multiplied, he identified a few months ago that being near Johnny was the trigger for them. The weird feeling he got around him sometimes. Which now happened _all_ the time. 

*

“So Hyuck asked me out. On a date. Like b-boyfriends,” Mark finally spit out after beating around the bush and Johnny rolled his eyes, because of course that was the reason to for their 'hangout'.

It was three am in the morning in the coffee shop around his house. His brother called him out in panic and like the good brother he was he came immediately, still clad in his bear pajamas and bed hair, wanting to make sure Mark was alright.

Only to see his little brother was just being his dramatic self and safe and sound after all, thank god.

“So what did you say?” Johnny said, when he saw Mark not adding anything else to his statement and just playing with the salt and pepper shaker. At least he stopped mutilating the poor tissues. The waitress was already eying them sharply.

“That I needed time to think,” he murmured and duked his head in shame. Johnny exhaled loudly in disbelief and really contemplated buying a coffee at this hour, but he also really wanted to go back into his warm bed and sleep some more.

He loved his brother dearly, it was just getting ridiculous. Their play of cat and mouse was going on far too long. He thought he made Donghyuck ready to take the lead but forgot how stubborn the boy could be and Mark really, _really_ took no risk at all in this so Donghyuck decided not to as well.

Actually that Donghyuck talked at all about it would've surprised Johnny more, if it wasn't _three_ in the morning.

“Listen Mark, I love you, you're my baby brother after all.” Mark scrunched up his face as if he wasn't secretly pleased inside to hear him say it, Johnny shook his head but decided to stay silent about it for now. “And I am saying this in the most loving way possible: Man up a little! I know you like _like_ Donghyuck. Apparently he is an idiot as well, because he likes you back. But I also know others who are fond of him as well. So you should take the risk before he gets tired of your antics and moves on....”

A lie because while others have their eyes set on Donghyuck, Donghyuck only saw his dumb brother as if Mark personally hung up the stars in the sky. _Young love_. But a small lie wouldn't hurt Mark, who seemed deep in thought after his little speech.

Someone plopped down loudly next to him, Jaehyun gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and started to munch on his blueberry muffin. His sleeping mask was converted to a hairband, his hair a literal bird nest but Johnny still shot heart eyes at him anyway, especially since he gave him and Mark double chocolate cookies, their favorites.

Mark took it absentmindedly and picked more at it than actually eating it. That was until he realized what it was and then gulped it down in a few seconds. “Babe, what are you doing here?” Johnny asked quietly to not disturb his clearly half asleep partner and deep in thought brother. He smiled when Jaehyun yawned loudly.

Jaehyun slept like a rock and normally wouldn't wake up even if there was an earthquake, so Johnny was really surprised to see him here since he tried to leave as quietly as possible.

His boyfriend leaned his weight on him, not that Johnny minded, his eyes barely open and Johnny was sure he was on his way to fall asleep again. “It was too cold without you,” Jaehyun whined cutely and Johnny grinned while putting his arm around his boyfriend, who tried to cuddle more into him which was kinda impossible.

It was a treat for him to see Jaehyun act so cutely outside their shared apartment.

“Gross.”

Mark tried to say it with playful disgust to mask his longing und envy but Johnny saw right through him. He shot him a meaningful look. “If you want this,” he gestured to himself and Jaehyun, who seemed to have fallen asleep again. “Find Donghyuck,who is probably beating himself up for being brave and tell him you want to give it a chance because he is the best damn thing that happened to you. And then kiss him like you mean it and be happy. The End”

For the first time this night Johnny saw a change in Marks eyes, which was a good thing.

“Please don't let this chance get away. He could be your forever, don't let him slip away.” Johnny looked fondly at Jaehyun at the end of his sentence, he was still trying to snuggle closer into his chest, nearly trying to become one with him. Not that Johnny minded.

“When are you going to tell him?” Mark asked and pointed at his ring finger.

“Soon.” He answered with a mysterious smile. He had it planned out after all. Jaehyun might've been the one courageous enough to bring their relationship to the next level, but Johnny saw it as his duty to surprise the hell out of Jaehyun with his proposal. He already started researching a year ago and was planning it for months already.

“Soon.” Johnny repeated more excited, his eyes turning into crescents as he ran his hand through Jaehyuns mess of hair that still felt incredibly soft, even looking like that. Jaehyun sighed in content, even asleep he loved to be pampered.

“AHHHH,” Mark suddenly whisper shouted into their silence and seemed to surprise himself the most.

“I really want this,” Mark gestured to them wildly, the tips of his ears turned red real quick under Johnnys judging eyes. As if the whole world wasn't already aware of it. “Haha I know I know,” he added in defense and slid out of the booth. “Need to talk to Hyuckie hahaha.” He waved a quick goodbye and nearly sprinted out of the shop.

“That worked out fine,” Jaehyun said emotionless and scared the literal shit out of Johnny, who looked at him in utter surprise. There were moments where Jaehyun caught him off guard, apparently this was one of them. “You were awake?” His voice shook slightly, especially remembering Marks ring comment. There was no way Jaehyun wouldn't connect the dots.

It didn't help that Jaehyun gave him a weird look and stretched his arms out like a cute animal. Johnny cooed at the adorable behavior and got a little punch on the arm in return from his embarrassed boyfriend. “Mark's whisper shouting woke me up. Cute how we're his expectations, told you all those years ago we would make a handsome pair.”

Johnny laughed, half in relief and half in love. How he got to call this perfect human being his, will always remain a mystery to him. He was actually so glad Jaehyun seemed to only heard the last part of their conversation that he didn't see the secretive smile on his face and how he glanced at his ring finger in wonder.

“Soon,” Jaehyun whispered to himself in awe and kissed Johnny out of nowhere, not that Johnny would ever complain. Johnny wasn't the only idiot deeply in love after all.

*

**Author's Note:**

> It turned out different than what I expected. Originally I wanted to make it harder for Jaehyun to realize why he felt this way and also make him act more childish in his jealousy, but then I thought about how I imagined them for this story. This Johnny would annoy the hell out of his friends and make them angry from time to time but would never hurt them on purpose and if, would do anything to make it right. And Jaehyun is more of the quiet, mature and at friends side blooming, kinda guy. So it turned out more mellow and wholesome all in all. 
> 
> I hope this story bought a little smile on your face and I would appreciate some feedback in form of kudos or comments, I love interacting with you guys and hear your thoughts on it!! I wish you all a beautiful weekend/week ahead. Please stay happy and healthy~ ♡
> 
> edit: I just saw this humble story got over 100 kudos, thank you very much for all the support! this made me very happy ♡


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